Plays on the 5,6,7,8,9,10 people. Collection №4
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YURA (recovering from the shock, trying to cope with a nervous TIC that came from nowhere): Sanek… Healthy, old boy. You what is this neither light nor sh…, (takes a breath) nor dawn, and even so shocking. And what about the mother? I didn't hear…
Sanek collects the basin, bucket, and ladle that he dropped, and carefully sets them all aside.
SANEK (irritated): Yes, I'm talking… Your mother is a good woman. Economic. All something kolgotitsya, something pyzhitsya, something all makes, prepares… (points to the basin and bucket), washes, obviously. Or are you doing the Laundry?
Yura's outraged facial expressions and gestures speak for themselves.
YURA (taken aback): A fool or what?
SANYA (smoothing out the corners): Me? Yes, it seems not quite. It's just that the "tazovederny trains" in your house didn't cross my path before. And as for neither light nor SRA… (takes a breath) nor dawn, so it's you overreacted. What a morning, it's almost eleven o'clock!
Yura licks the remains of the porridge from the spoon and calls out to her mother with displeasure.
YURA (loudly, addressing the kitchen): Mom! Here it is… Need a rag… and grab a dustpan and brush!
Mom comes running with a rag, brush and dustpan, warmly greets Sanka. He's busy cleaning up after his son.
YURA (to her mother, incredulously): Mom, is it really eleven o'clock?
MOM (calmly, good): True, my son, it's already past eleven.
YURA (to her mother, indignantly): Why did you Wake me up so late? Didn't I ask you to Wake me up at nine? Today we have a business meeting with Sanka. I should have been prepared, at least had time to Wake up properly!
MOTHER (calmly, good): I did Wake you up, son. I came to you four times, but you didn't Wake up. He grumbled, swore, and threw a pillow at me one last time. Breakfast was already cold, and I had to warm it up. I tried, really.
YURA (to her mother, indignantly): So you're not trying hard. I should have done something different, I don't know… to be smart. Shamed me in front of a friend.
Yura makes an indignant grimace and rolls her eyes.
SANYA (smoothing out the corners): Come on, whatever. It happens to everyone. I've sometimes gone as far as twelve, or even as far as two.
MOM (with interest): What kind of event are you planning? Business meeting? Did you decide to get a job?
Sanek and Yura look at their mother with a disapproving, reproachful look, but they are silent.
Mom understands their look and shakes her head.
MOTHER (disappointed): Well yes… What am I, really? What kind of work in thirty-six years. Small yet. (Sanku) And it's probably too late for you, Sasha. (Resignedly, continuing cleaning) Never mind, we'll hang out sometime. I understand everything, these are difficult times, the employer is deceiving at every step. (Son) You'd better be at home, so it will be safer, and calmer. I've got a pension for a thousand dollars, and I've taken some home-sewing work. It's normal, why complain, a lot of people live worse.
The mother finishes cleaning up after her son, goes to the kitchen.
SANEK (admiringly): You have a great mother. Here is my me constantly shpynyaet – go work, go work. I may be about to turn forty, but you can't just take me. Spend priceless years of your life sitting in depressing warehouses, production halls, or dusty offices? I didn't find myself in a dumpster. It is necessary to live brightly, easily, naturally! It's so easy. Is it really that hard to understand? After all, our old people should be wise, and they are some kind of stupid on the contrary.
Yura looks reproachfully at his friend.
SANEK (making excuses): well… it doesn't apply to your mother, but in General… some generation of fools seems to have grown up in the post-war years. Well, it's understandable, in General, it was hard, it was necessary to raise the country! Education and self-development was not at all in the first so to speak needs…
YURA (turning the topic): Okay, no more demagoguery. What was there, how it was there. We met today for a very specific event, so we won't waste any time!
SANEK (clapping his hands, rubbing his hands): Yes!
YURA (businesslike): So, my dear friend. What do we have? So I'm thirty-six years old!
SANEK (cheerfully, enthusiastically): So!
JURA (business): Marriage was not seen…
SANYA (cheerfully, enthusiastically): I wasn't!
JURA (business): As in fact, and in General in the company of a girl.
SANEK (surprised): Really? What in General, what if never with anyone and never?
YURA (judiciously): It happens! Haven't you read Omar Khayyam? Here he says that it's better to be alone than with just anyone!
Sanek scratches his chin thoughtfully.
SANEK (surprised): However… And have you read much of this outstanding man's work?
YURA (hesitating): Frankly, not very much. Yes, in all conscience, only this.
SANEK (smiling contentedly): Ah…Well… that's What I thought.
YURA (businesslike): So! Again with the topic jumped. So, today we are going to find me a life partner! Or have you changed your mind to help me in this difficult task?
SANEK (smiling contentedly): What are you, old boy! Where are you without your old friend, wise bitter experience in the field of gender relations? Of course, I will help, I have already made some sketches, so to speak, variants. We are going to place an ad about Dating on the Internet?
YURA (delovo): Well, where else? Not on the fence as in the middle ages…
SANYA (business): There! I figured out how to correctly compose the ad text, so that, you know – to hook! To attract! To catch the hook of such a girl, with whom you will then swim all your life in the ocean of passion!
YURA (rather admiringly): That's what an experienced friend means! As I said! Come on, come on. What are the options you came up with?
Sanek is all of himself, he feels the master of the situation, he is the "king of the world".