The Original Sinners: The Red Years
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“You’re a madwoman, Nora. Why did you do this?”
Nora gave a cold, hollow laugh, grimacing as the movement seemed to hurt her.
“Remember that day in my kitchen,” she said, pausing to catch her breath. “That first day we were working on my book. You asked me what Wes’s story was.”
“Yes, I recall. Why?”
“I told you I’d put the first randy bitch who laid a hand on him in the hospital. Turns out it was me. Hey, never let it be said I can’t keep a promise.”
“Nora…you will be the death of me,” Zach said, wanting to laugh, too, but finding it utterly impossible.
“You keep saying that. And yet you’re still alive. What the hell are you doing here anyway? Where’s Grace?”
“I dropped her off at the airport.”
“You let her leave without you? Are you insane?”
“I can’t just bloody go—”
“Yes, you bloody well can,” Nora countered. “Just go. Don’t pack your toothbrush. Don’t call work. Just get on a goddamn plane and go get your wife back. For good this time.”
Zach stared at the tiles on the floor. His eyes followed the spots of black and white, letting them swirl together and become gray.
“Go, Zach. You have no idea how much I want to keep you here. Selflessness is not in my nature. Go before I change my mind.”
“What about Wesley?”
“He’ll be fine, too. We’ll be fine. And we finished the book. Your job is done.”
Zach looked up and met her eyes. “You must hate me.”
“I understand. Trust me.”
Zach felt a terrible tightening in his chest. “I couldn’t have gone back to her, wouldn’t have known how if it wasn’t for you. I’m sure that makes no bloody sense whatsoever.”
“Oh, it makes perfect sense.” Nora laughed. “I taught you how to leave me.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I’m not. Soren told me you were still in love with Grace. I should have listened.”
“Soren…why?” Zach shook his head.
“Why?” Nora scooted back on her pillow and briefly closed her eyes. “Why? Soren has loved me since the day we met. He’s loved me since I was fifteen years old. He’s loved me without fear, without guilt, without failing and without flinching every day of my life.” She opened her eyes again and looked at him. “He’s the only man who never hurt me.”
Zach searched for words, any words, but couldn’t find them.
“Nora, I—”
“It’s okay. Really. You have to go. You’re wasting time. You’ve had your bags packed since the day I met you. But it was never to L.A. you were going. We both know that. Go home.”
Zach stood up and walked on shell-shocked feet toward the door.
“Zach?”
Zach turned around. Nora was looking at him.
“It meant something to you, didn’t it? Me? My book? Last night wasn’t just—”
It took less than a second to get from the door to Nora’s bedside. Zach took her face in his hands and, careful of her bruises, kissed her with the passion of a man who knew the next woman he kissed would be the only woman he’d kiss for the rest of his life.
“Yes,” he said, breathlessly. “It meant something.”
Nora nodded. “You’re still my editor, right?”
“Always.”
“I have an idea for a new book. But I’ll need your help.”
Zach touched the unbruised side of her face.
“Just remember, show, don’t tell.” He winked at her.
Nora laughed again, her wicked, dirty, perfect laugh.
“How much are they paying you for this?”
* * *
The drive home from the hospital felt interminable. Wesley didn’t speak and Nora was afraid to shatter the silence. He pulled into their driveway. She got out of the car and felt a sudden wave of dizziness as the painkiller the nurse gave her kicked in when she stood up too fast. She thought she was about to go down, but then Wesley had her in his arms and carried her into the house.
“You shouldn’t have left the hospital.” Wesley set her on the couch.
“I’ve left AMA before. You have to or they’ll start calling in for psych evaluations and other shit you don’t need.”
“You sure you don’t need one?”
“I had a feeling that deep down you thought I was actually crazy,” Nora said.
Wesley sat in the chair next to the couch. He leaned back and covered his face with his hands.
“I’d like to think you weren’t in your right mind when you did this to me.”
Nora leaned back into the couch cushions. Every breath she took hurt, but not from the pain in her ribs.
“I didn’t do it to you,” she said. “I did it for you.”
“That makes no sense, Nora.”
“You promised me you’d leave me if I went back to Soren. Leaving me is the best thing for you to do.”
“You want me go?” he asked, his voice soft with shock.
“No. Never.” She hated the look of relief on his face. “But I need you to. I can’t keep you anymore.”
Wesley ran his hands through his hair. His face was red, his eyes rimmed with unshed tears. “Let me keep you then.”
“No, sweetheart, I can’t. I—”
“Do you love me?”
“Wesley, it’s not morning until you’re awake. And it’s not night until you’re asleep in your bed under my roof. And I could go on and on but hope is a horrible thing, and I love you too much to give you any. I need you to do something for me.”
“Anything,” Wesley said. “Everything.”
“Please,” she begged. “Keep your promise.”
Wesley opened his mouth to speak, to protest, but he turned his head at the sound of a car honking discreetly outside.
Nora met his eyes.
“That’s for me,” she said, standing up.
“You’re really going back to him?”
Nora faced Wesley. All she wanted to do was take him in her arms and hold him until all their pain was gone. But there was no time for that anymore. And his pain and hers weren’t going anywhere anytime soon.
“Wes, I don’t think I ever actually left him.”
Nora grabbed her purse by the door and dug inside it. She pulled out her wallet and wrote a check to Wesley.