The Original Sinners: The Red Years
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“I hate you sometimes.” Nora said the words without venom or remorse.
Soren reached out and caressed her burning face.
“You’ve been saying that since you were fifteen.”
“You want me to pick you over Wes,” she said, shaking her head. “I won’t do it.”
Soren leaned in again. His hand moved to her neck, his mouth brushing her shoulder.
“The choice was never Wesley or me,” he said, cupping her breast. Nora felt a rising panic. If she didn’t stop him he would take her here on the floor with Zach just outside. If she didn’t stop herself, she would let him. “The choice is Wesley or you.”
Soren gripped her by the neck. His fingers dug into her soft skin. It hurt and yet for all the world she didn’t want it to stop. She wanted him to shove her onto the floor, wanted him to hurt her, bruise her, mark her and take everything from her…but she remembered her promise to Wesley, felt a new panic at the thought of losing him. The house would be so empty without him…
Nora pressed close to him. She would never want anyone as she wanted Soren.
“Jabberwocky,” she whispered into Soren’s ear.
Soren’s hands were off her in an instant. Even she was shocked that she’d spoken the word. In all their years together, this was only the second time she’d safed out.
Soren looked at her. She expected to see fury but he seemed strangely pleased.
“Let me go, Soren,” she said, too tired to fight him anymore. “I’m on my own now. I love who I love and I fuck who I fuck.”
Soren reached for the key again but did not turn it.
“You love whom you love. You fuck whom you fuck. I see you do need your editor after all. Go.” With an arrogant smirk he flipped the key and opened the door. Nora rushed out and into Zach’s waiting arms.
“Aren’t you forgetting something, Eleanor?” Soren called out after her. Nora grimaced and took a deep breath. She tried smiling at Zach before she turned back to Soren, now standing on the threshold between the hallway and the elevator.
Returning to him, she bobbed the necessary curtsy. But it was not enough for Soren. He took her face in his hands and kissed her forehead. His fingers were still damp from being inside her.
“My little one…” he breathed, turning his face so that his cheek pressed against her forehead. He had done that so many times to her. How many? A million? It never failed to make her forgive him. She met his eyes and smiled, her anger momentarily forgotten. He was still too powerful a force in her life to leave things unfinished between them. She pulled away reluctantly, wondering if she would have to spend the rest of her life leaving this man.
“Oh, cloro al clero.” She sighed and Soren laughed. It was the real laugh she heard so rarely these days and missed so much. She smiled back and returned to Zach with only the hint of regret in her heart.
Zach still waited patiently for her. Something had indeed changed in him during his time with Soren. She reached out for her coat, but Zach gave her his hand instead and pulled her close to him. Just because she could, she unwrapped the white scarf from around Zach’s bicep. Zach looked down at her and she winked. She tossed the white scarf at Soren’s feet. Soren glanced down at the scarf and then up at her again.
“How easily you forgive, Eleanor.” Soren stared at them with his wise and all-knowing eyes. “How freely you absolve the sins of others. Tell me, little one, when the time comes, how will you absolve yours?”
Nora had no answer. Soren merely smiled again and took a step back into the elevator. The doors closed and Soren descended into the pit below.
Hell was due for another harrowing.
23
Zach greeted the cool March night air with gratitude as they exited the stifling atmosphere of the club and returned to the parking garage.
“I’m sorry, Zach,” Nora said as they reached the car. “I should have warned you about Soren.”
“I can understand now why you were reluctant to. It must have been very difficult to have a relationship with him…for so many reasons.”
Nora threw her coat in the car. “Tell me about it. It was like being with a married guy, except this guy happens to be married to God and the entire Catholic Church. That’s a lot of competition.”
“I’m glad you left him. He’s—” Zach searched for the right word “—terrifying.”
“Thought I was terrifying.”
“You were. Then I met him.”
“You’ve never met a Jesuit before, have you?”
Zach gave her a blank look.
“Soren was trained as a Jesuit. They’re an infamous militant religious order. Otherwise known as ‘God’s Marines.’ They used to eat Protestant heretics,” Nora said with a dark grin. “But these days they’re known more for their rather liberal stance on abortion, homosexuality and…priestly celibacy.”
“Very liberal stance, I see. Are you sure he’s on God’s side?” Zach asked.
Nora laughed. “Very sure. And believe me, God’s relieved that he is. But don’t overreact. Soren was just fucking with your head. It’s his favorite part of the body to fuck with. Well, maybe second favorite.”
“I can’t believe you’re defending him.”
“Well, he was defending me.”
Zach looked at her. “What do you mean?”
“Back there with you. He’s worried you’re going to hurt me if you and I get involved. I mean, technically you’re still married. Soren’s really protective of me still. He wasn’t just trying to be a bitch to you, Zach. He was making sure you knew that if you hurt me, you’d have to answer to him.”
Zach blanched a little. He remembered the day he’d had to answer to Grace’s father about what had happened between them. That had possibly been the second worst day of his life. And Grace’s father was a teddy bear compared to Nora’s Father.
“Nora, I’ll no more answer to him than you should have to. He dragged you away and ordered you around like you were his own personal property. You aren’t even with him anymore. House rules or not, he has no right to treat you like that.”
Nora took her keys out of her coat pocket and held one up.