Conflicts in the family
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Children who grow up in families where their parents are divorced are essentially orphans with living parents. The psyche deteriorates so much that it will sometimes be quite difficult to adapt to life.
When you are young, your rash actions can then be reflected in your old age. As you know, in life you have to pay for everything, so the question is not whether you can avoid punishment or not, but when it comes and how severe it will be.
Many philosophers and psychotherapists consider polygamy as a psychological disease, even as a mental illness, to be more precise, a deviation when a person seeks diversity for the same actions. A person may live with one for convenience, and then walk on the side. Everyone has their own interest.
It is better to give passion to each other than to be scattered so everywhere, there is no point in this at all. Learn to abstract in your problems, otherwise you can even drown in your thoughts, get confused.
Money
The fact that a man earns little or does not spend enough on his wife is quite common. This is no longer perceived as something eventful. Everyone is sure that this is normal, or rather, not normal.
Why did we decide to focus on money separately?
The presence or absence, or lack of money often leads to conflicts, sometimes so strong that they end up in divorce quite quickly.
The world has become so immersed in commodity-money relations that it has become a kind of fuel, the absence of which begins to anger the subjects of the economy. In this case, each person can be represented as a subject of the economy, since he does not have enough money.
It is necessary to proceed from the capabilities of the region and other circumstances that may limit wages.
Happy is not the one who has a lot, but the one who has enough. Minimalism during certain periods of life can sometimes be useful to think more conceptually about what is really important in life.
There is no point in continuing this chapter for too long, because everyone has a different attitude to money.
There is a saying that you need to earn more than save, but you need both in order for the positive balance to grow.
Families manage their household in different ways, some manage a joint budget, some try to distance themselves in this matter, and everyone spends more on themselves than on the joint budget. But there is a caveat that in this case, the joint budget will be smaller. Joint purchases should be discussed earlier and discussed. The language was invented by mankind not to quarrel, but to negotiate.
This chapter deals with the case when a husband becomes the instigator or problem for conflicts, because he earns either little or a lot, but does not spend on what his wife wants.
Make some tea, sit down, and talk. Why fight and show your ego? What is the point of perceiving the world that everyone is wrong?
If you really believe that your husband doesn't work because he doesn't want to, then you need to inspire him, and how you do this is up to you. This section of the book will not go to such tips, this is not exactly my specialty. But I think you understand what I meant, so I believe in you that you will succeed. Love each other more, and everything will work out for you.
Do not put pressure on the man, do not put pressure on him as a male and a breadwinner, in a good way. Restriction and pressure on a moral man leads to nervous breakdowns. He can not answer with words in contrast, men, in general, are poorly versed in intrigues and do not know how to build them. You can't use physical force under any circumstances, so he's chased like a wolf with a stick stuck in a cage, and he can't respond.
It is necessary to remember, because some qualities in him you liked before marriage, perhaps they need to be cherished and through them to form the right person. A man-a man, a breadwinner, in the sense that nature gave birth to him. Scandals lead to nothing, they destroy the will.
Watch the couples on the street, how they walk and how cute they communicate, and whether they do it in a feigned or heartfelt way. You don't need to try to be better, or rather, to appear better than you really are. This applies to both men and women. In extreme situations, you will show yourself as you really are, for this reason, you can be very upset at some point.
The psychology of a person is amazing when he does a lot of good things, tries to do the maximum that he is capable of, no one appreciates it or thinks it's normal, but the tension of nerve cells is not visible. As soon as he commits one small weakness or blunder, a huge lump of discontent falls on him, which can simply trample him.
You don't need to kill the good in a friend and trim their wings just because it's a fairly simple activity in terms of energy costs. For this reason, actions that require less effort are performed more often, even if they are negative. A person always wants to fill the void, so he tries to fill it with actions that in turn can affect the other negatively.
Breaking dishes is always easier than making it, creating it. If you want to throw out your emotions on your husband or spouse, it is better to go out into the yard and take a walk, you do not need to respond to the emotional claims of one spouse or spouse, because evil can only give rise to evil. Emotions are always bad, and the worst thing is that they can trigger a violent response in words or even physically.
We must remember that moral violence is the same as violence, and it is not necessary to use it. Words can kill, words can save. Choose the second option.
Different views
People are all different, so different that even with the maximum similarity of two twins, you will not find identical twins in character. And, growing up in the same family, eating the same mother's pies, different children from the same family come to the first grade. If, of course, metaphysically they could be connected, or rather synchronized, so that they arrived at the same time, then the differences will be enormous.
What should I do if this is the case, and what should I do to find a consensus? We need to talk, we need to communicate, because the value of a person, or rather society, and in this case of spouses is that they should complement each other, the shortcomings of one should cover the other, and vice versa. Otherwise, the competition on the topic of who will throw the slippers further often leads to negative consequences.
Different life priorities that can change a person so much that they become a different person. An idea rules the world, so an idea rules a person. If there are no common interests between husband and wife, then you need to look for them. It is generally accepted that a person is always the same as he was twenty years ago.